Funny Jokes #2

[Kingroudy]

Jack, a loyal Christian, met a girl and fell in love with her. He thought that she was a virgin and decided to marry her. However the girl was not a virgin, and knowing that Jack will change his mind if he finds out, she asked her mother for advise.


Mother: Do not worry dear, just buy a little fire cracker and put it into your pussy, when you do it for the first time, light it up, and when it explodes tell him that you are a women now. I did the same thing with your father and he never found out.

So they got married, and on the wedding night when they were about to do it, she inserted a BIG fire cracker. She light it up, and the thing exploded with a very loud bang.


The girl: wow I am a women now.


Jack: WOW WOW ME TOO

[Tawa]

Originally Posted by Kingroudy

Jack, a loyal Christian, met a girl and fell in love with her. He thought that she was a virgin and decided to marry her. However the girl was not a virgin, and knowing that Jack will change his mind if he finds out, she asked her mother for advise.


Mother: Do not worry dear, just buy a little fire cracker and put it into your pussy, when you do it for the first time, light it up, and when it explodes tell him that you are a women now. I did the same thing with your father and he never found out.

So they got married, and on the wedding night when they were about to do it, she inserted a BIG fire cracker. She light it up, and the thing exploded with a very loud bang.


The girl: wow I am a women now.


Jack: WOW WOW ME TOO

loooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooll lllllll............... hahahaha... nice one it took me some time to understand, but at last, with xcoder's help over the msn fhemta thanks man... nice one bouckra b5abberoon yeiha bessaf wbdayyi3 wa2et ma3 2estez l'math la2anno ktir bi7ebboon hawdeh

[Rannouch]

واحد راح ع الفرن بكير وما في حدا..قللو للفران بدي خبز....قللو الفران: وقف ع الدور
قللو : أي دور يا زلمة.... ما في غيري..
قللو الفران: قلتلك وقف ع الدور ..
راح وقف شوي بعدين ضربو كف للفران.....عصب الفران وقللو:ليش ضربت......قللو: شو ما في غيري ..واحد من هالدور ضربك.......


اربعة حرابيق طالعين بتكسي, بدون ياكلوا الاجرة عالشوفير قام اتفقوا انو ينزلوا بسرعة بس توقف السيارة وفعلا وقفت السيارة قام فتحوا الابواب بسرعة واشتغل الركض رجليهم تدق بضهرهم من السرعة وفاتوا ببناية عالعظم وطلعوا اول طابق....تاني طابق....تالت.....هيك حتى وصلو لاخر طابق لزقوا بالحيطان ولا حس ولانفس هيك شي نص ساعة, بعدين واحد منهم نكش اللي ناحو قلو: يا ترى شو صار بالشوفير؟؟؟ قلو: لك انا الشوفير بس قلي شو القصة

[Rami_s]

[badboy_10452]

Youngest Son: Tell me Daddy, what is the difference between "potentially" and " in reality"?

Dad: I will show you

Dad turns to his wife and asks her: Would you sleep with Robert Redford for 1 million dollars?
Wife: Yes of course! I would never waste such an opportunity!

Then Dad asks his daughter if she would sleep with Brad Pitt for 1 million dollars?
Daughter: Waow! Yes! This is my fantasy!

So Dad turns to his elder son and asks him: Would you sleep with Tom Cruise for 1 million dollars?
Elder Son: Yeah! Why not? Imagine what I could do with 1 million dollars! I would never hesitate!

So the father turns back to his younger son saying:

You see son, "potentially" we are sitting on 3 million dollars, but "in reality" we are living with 2 bitches and a gay!

[Kingroudy]

there was once a little boy and he had a brother. him and his brother shared a room. one night the brother brings home his girlfriend and they go to ther top bunk. they started to have sex and to go faster she would say lettuce and to go slower she would say tomato. they were keep making a lot of noise through the night, so the little brother on the bottom bunk says "can you please stop making sandwiches, because you are getting mayonaisse all over meeh". hahahahaha

[Kingroudy]

This beautiful woman one day walks into a doctors office and the doctor is bowled over by how stunningly awesome she is. All his professionalism goes right out the window...
He tells her to take her pants, she does, and he starts rubbing her thighs.
"Do you know what I am doing?" asks the doctor?
"Yes, checking for abnormalities." she replies.
He tells her to take off her shirt and bra, she takes them off. The doctor begins rubbing her breasts and asks, "Do you know what I am doing now?", she replies, "Yes, checking for cancer."
Finally, he tells her to take off her panties, lays her on the table, gets on top of her and starts having sex with her. He says to her, "Do you know what I am doing now?"
She replies, "Yes, getting herpes(an inflamatory desease) - thats why I am here!"

[Jean]

Girls night out

Two women friends had gone out for a Girls Night Out, and had been decidedly over-enthusiastic on the cocktails. Incredibly drunk and walking home they suddenly realized they both needed to pee. They were very near a graveyard and one of them suggested they do their business behind a headstone or something. The first woman had nothing to wipe with so she took off her panties, used them and threw them away. Her friend however was wearing an expensive underwear set and didn't want to ruin hers, but was lucky enough to salvage a large ribbon from a wreath that was on a grave and proceeded to wipe herself with it. After finishing, they made their way home.

The next day the first woman's husband phones the other husband and said, "These damn girls nights out have got to stop. My wife came home last night without her panties." "That's nothing," said the other. "Mine came back with a sympathy card stuck between the cheeks of her butt that said, 'From all of us at the Fire Station, Well never forget you!'

[Kingroudy]

Little Johnny is in the classroom. All of a sudden, he raises his hand saying "TEACHER, TEACHER, I really have to PISS!!" The teacher says "that is not the type of language to be using in the classroom Johnny, the proper word to use is urinate. Once you use the word urinate in a sentence, you will be allowed to go." Little Johnny thinks for a minute, appearing stumped. Finally he says "You’re an eight, but if your tits were bigger, you would be a ten".

[Kingroudy]

The teacher says to the class "who can use the work fascinate in a sentence?" Little Suzie raises her hand and says "My mom and dad went to the zoo and saw all of the animals, they were fascinated." The teacher says "Good job, but I want to hear the word fascinate." Little Mary raises her hand "My parents looked at the sky last night and said the stars were fascinating" The teacher says "Good job, but I still want to hear fascinate" FINALLY, Little Johnny raises his hand, the teacher calls on him, and Johnny says "My sister has a shirt with ten buttons, but her tits are so big she can only fasten eight"






(tbakkel 8 zrar la yalle ma fehmou)