Any lebanese music producers ?

[McNaOH]

is there any good music producers here ? like trance or hardstyle music producers, or DJs that make music not just play it ?
cz i need a lil help rating my songs :/

[Joker666]

Yes I produce some music...
I'm not a professional producer though...

[McNaOH]

well i would apreciate if u rate this one over 10
its the second one i made, the first one is too stuborn, it doesnt wanna get uploaded >_<

http://www.mediafire.com/?seku6e1kcyq

[Joker666]

eno man...it's very weak, I would give it a 0.5/10
honestly i canot give you more, the song's structure is very weak
the instruments are weak, the flow is weak, everything is weak actually, sorry man but i canot lie to you and give you compliments, I'm straight forward with you.

where did u produce it btw? don't tell me e-jay!
don't dare tell me e-jay!

and in case u don't know good music production softwares, I recommend: Fruity loops, Reason, Ableton live, and cubase

[McNaOH]

i used fruity loops, and i talked to dutch DJs they said it was not bad melody and all, but i still didnt add any effects cz i ma ken ele jalad lol, and i am workin on a weak cpu without any good leads or kicks (using stuff from fruity loops)

[Joker666]

Yes U got some good sounds, but you don't know how to use them
there's no intro, no outro, no breakdown....the structure is bad
You don't follow a certain pattern, there are some measurments mistake as well.

I recommend u keep the main sounds, and try to create something with an a solid intro, a breakdown with the main melody, and an outro
and add more intruments to it...it would sound better
because you feel there is emptiness in it.
this is my current advice, If i have anything to add i'll let you know

[McNaOH]

yea i didnt kno how to start it, i changed like 4times, that was the best one, and btw that was the long version i uploaded, i made that to see what to change, ill upload the normal one in a bit.

[McNaOH]

http://www.mediafire.com/?onxoa4dt238
This is the normal one, about 3 min.
Well im gonna change the intro and the outro tonight, but the thing is i dont have a good bassline, the bass i using is pretty gay thats what i think is causing the emptyness, cz there's nothing on the off-beat, a friend gave me a hardstyle bass, but its too hard just doesnt fit, u kno what i mean ?
anyway thanks for the advice