About women ........

[NAN]

1. No we do not enjoy watching boring action movies and sports games we know nothing about, so it wouldn’t kill you to watch “The Fashion Police” with us every once in a while without complaining that your testosterone levels are dropping.

2. No we do not enjoy getting waxed at the salon. It’s time, money, and energy wasted on agonizing physical pain, so it wouldn’t hurt you to trim your nose hairs and tweeze your unibrow. We also understand that you’re a man and you’re entitled to chest hair, but please don’t abuse the privilege. If you can braid them, shave them!

3. We also burp and fart . . . in private. How would you feel if your woman rubbed her belly and burped after each meal?

4. We get our nails manicured on a weekly basis so that our delicate lady hands remain soft, polished, and appealing. We’re not asking you to have lady hands too, but we don’t want you to have Godzilla hands either. Cut your nails, push back your cuticles, and don’t chew at them. It’s quite simple.

5. We have eyes; we can see when your vision wanders from our face to our breasts. Please keep in mind that there is no way to be subtle about it.Don’t gawk at them while we’re talking to you. Eww.

7. We’d rather be with a man who doesn’t dance rather than with a man who can’t dance but still insists on dancing like he’s at a gay parade. If you don’t know your moves, sit down. Contrary to Abba’s song, you are not the dancing queen.

8.Whether we’re out on our 1st or 93rd dinner together, we want dessert. Whether we ask for it or not, we want dessert. Whether we’re dieting or not, we want dessert. When you’re in doubt, order us dessert (preferably something with lots of chocolate) – why? Because we want dessert.

9- If we love you, we will turn into worriers. We will worry about what you eat, how you sleep, and everything else. We do not like hearing that we are like your mother; so instead of complaining, appreciate that a female gives a crap about you.

10-We understand there’s a three day rule to calling a girl after you first meet her. We don’t like that rule. It’s become so cliché and we don’t like men who need to plan their every move. This is not a board game, so spontaneity won’t give you an ulcer. Call us the next day; not only will be appreciate it, but we’ll appreciate you.

11- When we ask you what outfit we should wear, just pick one! We won’t wear the one you choose so don’t be angry; but nevertheless, pick one!

12- Never underestimate a woman’s instinct. We’ll know you’re going to cheat before you even know it. No matter what tactic you choose to hide it, we’ll know. If we don’t tell you anything about it, it’s because we’re devising a plan to ruin your life. You never know, we could also become friends with your new babe while we’re at the nail salon. We function that way.

13- Differentiate between your ex-girlfriends . If you call your ex-girlfriend bad names, it means you’ll call us a bad names too at some point. As for your ex s, we don’t care for them; your relationship CV is like your professional CV; focus on quality.

14- We never stop thinking; whether we’re sleeping, eating, driving, watching TV . . . we never stop thinking. We understand you can’t multitask, and so you fall into deep trances of nothingness, but we can think, type, take a phone call, and good morning u all at once. Embrace that and don’t be surprised when we keep asking you what you’re thinking about . . . we just haven’t registered yet how empty you are inside.

15- If we’re playing with our hair, it doesn’t necessarily mean we’re flirting with you, it could mean we’re so bored that we’re amusing ourselves with something else . . . or maybe because you’re standing way too close.

16-We understand that you’re the man and no being is more powerful than you, but you won’t bust a nut if you ask for directions when you’re lost. I believe that’s the biggest turn on ever: a man who admits to not knowing something and takes the initiative of finding out.

17- We take way too long to get ready, we know that. That being said, we love how it always takes you 12 minutes to get ready (whether it’s for a football game or for a cocktail dinner). If you take more time to get dressed, we’ll wonder what you’re doing in there.

18- No, not all of us are programmed to get married, and not all of us are devising evil plans to get you to pop the question. Many of us are actually very happy being independent.

19- Never refer to us as your “lady friend”, whether we’ve been dating for a week or a year, or that’s exactly what we’ll become.

20- No matter how ugly, unsuccessful, short, fat, or bald you are, if you’re funny, we’ll go out with you.

21- We don’t like men who call themselves pimps or who dress like pimps. For starters, look up the meaning in the dictionary. It’s so ugly when you wear dark shades at night, big gold rings on your pinky finger, or big gold chains around your neck.

22- We like fit bodies, but it’s a big turn-off when you look as though you’ve pumped air into your biceps at the petrol station. Never count your calories in front of us and never act anorexic like food is the enemy; only women are entitled to that annoying privilege.

23- When we run into your ex-girlfriend in public, you better put your arm around us (whether we are in a fight or not), and oh you are in deep sh** if we are the ones that have to introduce ourselves.


24- “Bros before Girls” . . . sure darling. Would you like us to count how many times your friends have tried to hit on us? That being said, our enemies better not be your friends.

25- Your obsession with your Play station, X Box, iPad, or whatever, is pathetic . . . especially when we walk into the room and you treat us like we’re invisible. I’ll tell you what we really think about your new top score, we’d like to take it and shove it up you

[H@SSàN]

I'm doomed ...

[Kingroudy]

i could agree on some, but if it wasn't you who wrote this, i could also unleash my fury.

[mr_j]

here's what troubles me and I will never understand: every woman has a zillion guy wanting to date her, many of these guys fit the description that women give as a perfect boyfriend:charming sweet, asks for direction, keeps the toilet seat down. yet women date men who are the exact opposite of that and then complain

so my only reply to this would be"get better taste" and stay away from my new top score

[MORPHEUSP]

lol i only see a description of Fred Flinstones in what you wrote , long story short we are NOT Fred Flinstones, but sure we can make that bed-rock xD , had to say it the oldest and funniest pickup line in the book i agree with mr_j btw. teneh we'll do anything you want unless you're not driving

[Confucius]

lol that's a nice list, although I disagree with a few points but mostly it's true, I can't cheat on Man Utd or my Console though
bottom line is, girls have to compromise a little aswell as guys (waiting for girls to get dressed or waiting an hour for a girl to go in the SuperMarket to get a bar of chocolate, etc..) but nevertheless, funneh!

[Miss O.]

OH MY.... dearest!

first of all id love to know if this was something forwarded through email or did you write it all?

second, oui there are valid points, lots of them, but at the same time many over exaggerated stuff, and like Mr j said and talking as a female we tend to fall for the stuff we say we don't like (sometimes) haha.

i think if we had every guy read this before getting into a relationship ...he'd run for his life.

We are complicated and tend to wish guys were psychic sometimes, just as guys can be insensitive jerks...but i believe its all a game of learning to get to know each other because once you do you understand you both have the same worries or funny jokes but thought it wasn't manly enough to share or not girly enough to say. And like someone else mentioned compromise!

in all mahdoumé lpost.

Miss O.

[lebanese_a]

2. No we do not enjoy getting waxed at the salon. It’s time, money, and energy wasted on agonizing physical pain, so it wouldn’t hurt you to trim your nose hairs and tweeze your unibrow. We also understand that you’re a man and you’re entitled to chest hair, but please don’t abuse the privilege. If you can braid them, shave them!

Ignore this, it depends on the one you choose :P

8.Whether we’re out on our 1st or 93rd dinner together, we want dessert. Whether we ask for it or not, we want dessert. Whether we’re dieting or not, we want dessert. When you’re in doubt, order us dessert (preferably something with lots of chocolate) – why? Because we want dessert.

That's new to me :P anyone can confirm it?

9- If we love you, we will turn into worriers. We will worry about what you eat, how you sleep, and everything else. We do not like hearing that we are like your mother; so instead of complaining, appreciate that a female gives a crap about you.

Personally I like that :P

10-We understand there’s a three day rule to calling a girl after you first meet her. We don’t like that rule. It’s become so cliché and we don’t like men who need to plan their every move. This is not a board game, so spontaneity won’t give you an ulcer. Call us the next day; not only will be appreciate it, but we’ll appreciate you.

It's actually a 4 days rule now, please update the guys that didn't receive the memo yet!

11- When we ask you what outfit we should wear, just pick one! We won’t wear the one you choose so don’t be angry; but nevertheless, pick one!

Note that doesn't mean a Girl is also required to pick anything when you ask her, she still have the right to not pick anything and freak out at you for not being able to make a decision.

12- Never underestimate a woman’s instinct. We’ll know you’re going to cheat before you even know it. No matter what tactic you choose to hide it, we’ll know. If we don’t tell you anything about it, it’s because we’re devising a plan to ruin your life. You never know, we could also become friends with your new babe while we’re at the nail salon. We function that way.

We can do that too btw!

13- Differentiate between your ex-girlfriends . If you call your ex-girlfriend bad names, it means you’ll call us a bad names too at some point. As for your ex s, we don’t care for them; your relationship CV is like your professional CV; focus on quality.

There's a lot of contradiction is this point but yeah never call your exes bad names

16-We understand that you’re the man and no being is more powerful than you, but you won’t bust a nut if you ask for directions when you’re lost. I believe that’s the biggest turn on ever: a man who admits to not knowing something and takes the initiative of finding out.

Experience taught me that the GPS solves this, you come out a Hero for finding the way alone (He got the great Idea of using the GPS, he's a genius) and you don't have to ask anyone for directions!

20- No matter how ugly, unsuccessful, short, fat, or bald you are, if you’re funny, we’ll go out with you.

Depends on the chick.

22- We like fit bodies, but it’s a big turn-off when you look as though you’ve pumped air into your biceps at the petrol station. Never count your calories in front of us and never act anorexic like food is the enemy; only women are entitled to that annoying privilege.

Rejel bala kerech ... u know the rest :P

23- When we run into your ex-girlfriend in public, you better put your arm around us (whether we are in a fight or not), and oh you are in deep sh** if we are the ones that have to introduce ourselves.

You're actually stupid if you do not do that!

25- Your obsession with your Play station, X Box, iPad, or whatever, is pathetic . . . especially when we walk into the room and you treat us like we’re invisible. I’ll tell you what we really think about your new top score, we’d like to take it and shove it up you

If you find a girl that will play with you! MARRY HER!

Originally Posted by Miss O.

We are complicated and tend to wish guys were psychic sometimes, just as guys can be insensitive jerks...but i believe its all a game of learning to get to know each other because once you do you understand you both have the same worries or funny jokes but thought it wasn't manly enough to share or not girly enough to say. And like someone else mentioned compromise!

in all mahdoumé lpost.

Miss O.

Correct! they are so complicated I think they don't even know understand themselves sometimes! God help us!

[TAREK®]

Originally Posted by mr_j

here's what troubles me and I will never understand: every woman has a zillion guy wanting to date her, many of these guys fit the description that women give as a perfect boyfriend:charming sweet, asks for direction, keeps the toilet seat down. yet women date men who are the exact opposite of that and then complain

5aye women always want who they cant have its simple most of them at least, most of them zbelon byerekdo warak

[mr_j]

yeah bas that does not solve anything, iza rakado warayé aw rakadet warahon, how do you get a relationship?